This story was originally published in the Sarajevo Times.
By Ben, YES Abroad 2016-2017, Bosnia and Herzegovina
Almost every day, my host brother asks me, "Ho e kafu? Do you want coffee?", to which I always reply yes. After preparing the drink the traditional Bosnian way, he carefully pours the hot black coffee from its d ezva. My host brother passes me the small cup and we sit back and slowly sip our drinks. This Bosnian tradition has become a tradition for me too and is something I have come to appreciate and enjoy. Drinking coffee with my host family is one of my favorite parts of the day, and is part of what makes me feel truly at home living in a city over 6,000 miles away from home.
My name is Ben and I am a 16-year-old American high school student from the coast of California, living in Bosnia and Herzegovina as a youth ambassador on the Kennedy-Lugar Youth Exchange Study (YES) Abroad program. I've been in Sarajevo for almost three months now, and so far my time here has been filled with learning a new language, exploring a new city, and meeting new people.
Even though studying abroad has had its highs and lows, living in Bosnia and being able to open my eyes to a new culture and way of life has been an incredibly life-changing experience for me so far. From playing late night pickup basketball games with my host brothers to helping my host mom peel dried grah beans, being immersed into the daily life of Sarajevo has taught me so much about the culture of the country I now call my home.
As the excitement of living in a new city has faded into daily life for me, I have realized how similar the culture of my Bosnian host family is to the culture of my American family. Despite speaking different languages and celebrating different traditions, I believe that we are alike in more ways than we are different.
When I first arrived in Bosnia, I was able to connect with my host brothers through shared interests and beliefs. Despite growing up in different countries, we became closer because of our shared passion for graphic design, photography, and the NBA. We even read the same books just translated into our own languages.
Moreover, I have noticed that my two families share common goals and aspirations, and both strive for a better future for not only themselves, but for their friends, their community, and their country. My two families also share common fears and worries for the future. Understanding and accepting these shared aspects of our cultures has made living in Sarajevo even more meaningful for me. Not only has it expanded my worldview, living in Bosnia has made me realize how similar we all are, regardless of where we're from or what we believe in.
When I leave Bosnia and Herzegovina in June, it is this idea of a shared humanity that I want to carry with me back home. Today, conflicts arise because of cultural differences more than ever before. Religion, language, traditions, and beliefs more and more, we are becoming divided by the qualities that define us. How can we progress as a nation and as a world if we are stuck fighting battles over culture?
Through immersing myself in a culture different from my own, I have realized that these conflicts could be more easily resolved if people simply open their eyes, hearts, and minds to other cultures, and accept others for who they truly are instead of who they are thought to be.
About the YES Abroad Program
The YES Abroad Program, sponsored by the US Department of State, offers American high school students and recent graduates scholarships to study for one academic year in select countries with significant Muslim populations.
YES Abroad students serve as youth ambassadors of the United States, promoting mutual understanding by forming lasting relationships with their host families and communities. Participants live with a host family, attend a local high school, acquire leadership skills, and engage in activities to learn about the host country's society and values; they also help educate others about American society and values.